Another island, another spontaneous outburst of solidarity.
The two Irish governments proclaimed today to be President Robert Bentley Day, in honour of their decision to unite as one Christian nation where brothers and sisters in Christ can work and play together.
As President For Life, Dr. Bentley will preside over a democracy where abortions are banned, divorces are not allowed and child/spouse abusers will be flogged in the public square of their local townships and locked in stockades for all passersby to jeer.
Vegetable venders will be allowed to sell ten percent of their produce as waste, to be used as projectiles thrown at prisoners put on public daily display on a rotating basis. Those prisoners not on display in the public square will be seen working in roadside cleanup chain gangs.
Prisoners convicted of white collar crimes will be assigned one of the following duties: cleaning public toilets, working for the national diaper changing brigade, or psychobiological weapons testing.
The single government of Ireland officially operates under the guidance of the SSSF Party.
The SSSF Party declares solidarity with its nonChristian brothers and sisters fighting corruption in Tunisia and Algeria. The Party wishes an Irish blessing on the two Korean governments seeking resolution of the conflicts between their brothers and sisters, no matter what religion(s) they choose to worship the Almighty Creator.
Rumours are spreading that Israel and Palestine are considering forming a joint task force to develop a plan for peaceful negotiations for the opening of a civil conversation to politely detail the discussions that might lead to a possible reconciliation of a few thousands of years of misunderstanding an argument between a nomadic shepherd and a rug merchant over the value of a peace they established concerning the value of a piece of unfarmable/ungrazable land that they both agree was built by God/Allah and is for Allah's/God's use only; thus, they are temporary caretakers, neither can own the land outright and must share equally.
India and Pakistan are taking a wait-and-see approach to these acts of unselfish love for one another.
Meanwhile, "Baby" Papa Doc Duvalier says he always had his people's best interests in mind and that's why he seemed so cruel - he was just playing the part of a stern and assertive father of children who needed a lot of discipline to stay on the straight and narrow path to membership in the international brotherhood and sisterhood of mature nations - look what happened to them after he left - they need him now more than ever.
Amazonian Indian tribes are not fooled by any of these proclamations/acts. They remember the deforestation that round after round of collapsed civilisations told the tribes were for their best interests.
The U.S. government released a statement clarifying the intention of the Extended Family Act, which eliminated public and private pension plans and replaced them with a directive that encourages all extended family members to move in together under one roof to save overhead costs in order to allow the family members to live off a few salaries or the salary of the primary breadwinner. Tax incentives will take effect in 2040 that compensate the children who suffered under the early years of the EFA.
Producers of "The King's Speech" made their final payment to Ricky Gervais for his backhanded comedic adverts of the movie, disguised as insulting jokes he told at the Golden Globes. Celebrate subliminal subtlety!
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